Titirangi Storyteller

Telling tales from around the world

Suzhou Garden Reflections

with 8 comments

Been thinking about memory lately, how fickle it can be, how downright deceptive – and you think you’re being completely honest with yourself. Hah! I remember when ‘facing reality’ was something I could do. Or thought I could.

This image of a Suzhou Garden is completely deceptive…

Trust me – nothing about it is what you might think. Sure is pretty, though, isn’t it?

 

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Written by Titirangi Storyteller

06/03/2012 at 9:35 pm

8 Responses

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  1. Lovely.

    Wistful, surreal….an illegal tryst…a dangerous romance.

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    kolembo

    07/03/2012 at 7:59 pm

    • Oh I like that!.

      Here’s a question – a moot-ish one – no pressure… But when it comes to romance – can there be such a thing without an element of danger? It doesn’t have to be, and most likely wouldn’t be physical, but I wonder if any other kind would be exciting, enthralling, worth having…

      I have a similar theory about safe-sex, but it’s amazing how many people immediately think I am suggesting they abandon using condoms – which is not what I mean at all…

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      • Have thought about that actually…

        In the beginning there must be an element of….risque….you know, you don’t know anything about the other…could turn out to be Mafial

        And then the thrill of being compelled to open up – against all that your mind is telling you (coming as it is from being alone…i.e. single)

        It’s that funny thing about falling in love I think.

        What about when you KNOW you’re doing something wrong though…like cheating…or paying for the tryst…or being bought for that matter…?

        Ouestion – in this relationship for a year now – do people get (horror) bored?

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        kolembo

        07/03/2012 at 9:56 pm

      • Yes – that beginning sensation of risque – excitement – thrill – the unknown… for some of us, I think that is the only time in our lives we experience that sensation. And all too often, we do everything we can to get through that and second stage, opening up – and do the bare minimum to get by… so we can safely settle down and get on with life…

        As for when you KNOW you are doing something wrong – It’s been so long since I have wandered in that territory. I married for the 1st time in 1979, the second in 2000.

        I did have a wee naughty history back in the 70s – cheated on a couple of perfectly nice boys… Perhaps it was my Catholic girlhood – I was never one of those ‘easy’ Catholic girls – they got all the press, while the rest of us sat quietly with our knees together and grinned stupidly. But cheating made me feel stupid and ashamed and just plain bad.

        I did have a few encounters that did not involve cheating or money or drugs… but definitely broke a lot of MY rules, which is what matters… and the thrill was a bit heart-stopping. But none of that compares to when I met my second husband.

        I met him on line when I was 39 (he moved here 2 years later) and we have been on an adventure ever since. We have been through it all – the gamut from ecstasy to despair – and the occasional steady patch which some folks might call dull, but at least in our case, the passion never wavers and neither of us could imagine being bored with the other. And it IS because we live a little bit dangerously, and keep exploring ourselves and each other and making sure we get out of our comfort zone as often as possible – while maintaining ‘normal’ lives… I think if people get bored it is because they don’t do that. It is a bit of work – and you’ve both got to want to do it. There is so much to explore with a partner that we can’t do alone.

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      • Wayhey! Madam! You tart!

        Actually, it was good reading you today…you’re so right.

        I’m only in this a year and i ZOOOOOMED past that whole opening gambit.

        It had been so long that I just wanted to seal the deal and have him sitting on my couch, shoes off, coffee in hand, browsing the newspaper!

        We ‘settled in’ tout suite!

        It’s funny, yesterday, before bed, I was thinking about how people grow apart. What happens when people have been together for years and then suddenly it’s not working?

        You sound good, happy…good for you with your 2nd.

        If you don’t mind me asking, was your daughter with the first? What happened there?

        As for flaming passion, that remains…for the moment!

        Have a marvellous day Titirangi!

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        kolembo

        09/03/2012 at 8:21 pm

      • Some people should never be together. My parents were a horrendous mismatch. Didn’t stop them from having 4 kids and nearly destroying each other before their marriage ended after 6 years. But when they met they had such intense passion they believed they were meant for each other and married after six weeks.

        My dad ended up in jail for three months for assaulting their priest who was also their marriage counselor when he came home from work and found the two of them in bed together. And my mom had a ‘nervous breakdown’ and spent over a year in a mental hospital… they really went to town on each other. Passion gone terribly terribly wrong. she remarried 4 more times – all variations of the same theme. Once was enough for him.

        Both my daughters were from my first marriage. (the elder prefers I don’t photograph or discuss her) For years I had a list of things that were wrong with it (and him), but really – we were nearly as mismatched as my parents without the sheer insanity, and no amount of trying or compromise could make it work. We get along infinitely better now that we are divorced.

        And I am exhilerated to have the man of my dreams. Which doesn’t stop me from having those interesting and varied artisitic mood swings creative types are prone to…

        Today was good – tomorrow will be marvellous – barring foul weather, I will be shooting a dancer on the beach at sunset…

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  2. Some people have all of the passion but should not have a relationship. Know what I mean?

    You sound very happy with your second. I met mine in 2000, and we married in 2001, and I can’t believe that we’ve been together almost 12 years.

    Like

    poietes

    11/03/2012 at 8:51 am

    • For some people the 2nd time is magic… for some it’s the first… for some it just never happens, no matter how they try – they just can’t choose a life partner… I think we are the lucky ones that got a second chance and got it right…

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